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Joke of the Day

"Why did the piglets get in trouble in their biology class? They ate all the specimens."

"How many surrealists does it take to screw in a fish? Lightbulb."

"ok, i'm calling bullshit on Ariel singing underwater"

"[Science Meeting, 1924] Why don't we tell the people that every snowflake is unique? It's not like they'll ever really check ""Let's do it"""

"What muscle do Egyptian soldiers generally lose control of, shortly before major battles? The sphinxster ...."

"And now for the most stupidest joke ever. How do you say the word ""peanuts"" *without* the letter ""t""? Think about it."

"I'm selling my talking parrot. Why? Because yesterday, the bastard tried to sell me."

"Why do they run the credits at the beginning of Game of Thrones? Because you don't know who is going to make it to the end."

"Life is going pretty good for me lately I guess. I just got a booty call last night. It was from life. Apparently it still wants to fuck me."

"Why no, stranger, I CAN'T believe how early it gets dark now despite the fact this phenomena has occurred every single year of my existence."