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Joke of the Day

"Good News: The Giant Panda is no longer considered 'Endangered'. Bad News: It's now considered 'Extinct'."

"How can you tell if a man is happy? Who Cares?"

"Your mom is like a bowling ball she gets picked up, fingered, thrown down a dark alley, and she always comes back for more."

"How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four. One to screw in the light bulb and three to talk about how Neil Peart could've done it better."

"3 y/o: I want a bagel Me: We don't have any 3 y/o: You're a idiot Me: How did you survive your abortion"

"I said hello to a feminist My court date starts tomorrow."

"Maybe leave yourself in a hot car with a window open one inch for 15 minutes while your dog runs into the store"

"11: He shoots for her coffee. He SCORES! HE'S... Me: Grounded."

"You look like a before picture."

"I use Google to check if I have internet connection more than I use Google to Google."