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Joke of the Day

"Two Polish guys are hunting for bears in the woods. They come across a fork in the road with a sign that says ""BEAR LEFT"" They both turn around and go home."

"Reporter: Tell me about him Neighbor: He was so nice, sweet, friendly, funny R: Do you think he killed those people? N: Oh, yeah absolutely."

"KILLER: I'M GONNA CATCH YOU ME: YOU'LL NEVER CA- [stops running to pet a dog]"

"One comedian on Britain's got talent brought on wrapped boxes. He said he wanted to have on stage presence."

"little son knows How to scare parents? Dad: ""Can I see your report card, son?"" Son: ""I don't have it."" Dad: ""Why?"" Son: ""I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."""

"The worlds worst joke... EDIT: Thanks for the gold!"

"Have you ever heard of the lady who was accused of being the infamous Quilted Killer? She's innocent until proven quilty."

"What do you call a snake with a degree in engineering? A Boa Constructor"

"Possession is nine-tenths of the law. The other tenth must be exorcism."

"Me: Gouda would pair nicely with this merlot! Priest: This is communion... M: Oh. Gouda would taste well with the blood of Chr- P: Leave."