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Joke of the Day
"The pen is mightier than the sword. Unless you have like three followers then go with the sword"
Next Joke
"My girlfriend says I have a sharp tongue ... But I think she's just menstruating."
"What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever."
"I like my men like I like my packets of instant oatmeal: Chunky and knowledgeable with facts about dinosaurs."""
"You must have been born on a highway... ...because that's where most accidents happen. Thanks random kid on CS:GO."
"I'm just a girl, sitting in her car, wondering what the person I texted ""I'm in the cat"" to, is thinking right now."
"Do you know what indefinitely means? Well, if you're nuts are slapping against her ass, then you're in........ definitely"
"Why doesn't the United States have to worry about a North Korean nuclear missile attack? we have the Iron Giant"
"My wife was captured by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to her."
"How do you say Vaseline in German? Vienerslidein"