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Joke of the Day

"Me: Don't spit at your sister! 4: I'm a bunny. Me: Bunnies don't spit. 4: I'm an acid-spitting bunny."

"Did you know that Helen Kellet was born near Troy, Alabama? I guess that's why they called her ... yhe little deaf girl who couldn't see neither"

"Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming? He didn't see a porpoise..."

"Repent! Seek jesus! Judgement approaches!"

"Let's hope God grades on a curve or I'm so screwed."

"I created a robot that serves me pumpkin spice lattes... Naturally, I coded in BASIC"

"Think before you yell at your kids. They are the ones who might have to bring you toilet paper in 20 minutes"

"My wife was having an affair... I was devastated. But, by turning to religion I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing. I converted to Islam and we're stoning her in the morning."

"Why don't Middle Eastern dogs bite as often? Because they Muslim."

"What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee chord? My ass."