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Joke of the Day

"My cleaning lady always leaves me a list of supplies she needs to clean the house. Not sure what she needs 20 boxes of cold medicine though"

"I want to open a pizza shop called ""Cheesus Crust!"" Our slogan will be: ""Heavenly ingredients, served hot as Hell."" -or- ""Crust has risen."""

"For lunch today, I think I will have a blistering hot bowl of ice cold soup. Thanks microwave."

"A monk to another, ""O! master, is it proper for a monk to use email?"" ""Sure, as long as there are no attachments"", replied the other."

"Anyone heard that joke going around about paper? I thought it was pretty tearable."

"My wife likes to talk after sex She calls me from the motel"

"Why are there no American flags at the DNC? Because the delegates were standing on them."

"What's the one thing spiderman can't eat? Uncle bens rice"

"wife: um, why is the zoo calling about a missing giraffe? me measuring the ceiling: no idea."

"What is the advantage that Mexican workers have over everyone else? Their ""Senor""ity!"