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Joke of the Day
"Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming? He didn't see a porpoise..."
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"Why is it hard for old people to have sex? You ever try to pull apart a grilled cheese?"
"How does Moses make tea? Hewbrews it."
"If fire shoots out of the chimney the Papal Conclave has selected a new drummer for Slayer."
"Accidental dick pics can happen I once accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book. It was embarrassing and cost a fortune in stamps."
"What is the name of an Irish girl who hangs out on your lawn? Patti O'Furniture"
"What do Brits call a fleshlight? A blowtorch."
"What do we want?! LOW FLYING AIRPLANE NOISES! When do we want em?! NNNNEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWW"
"GOD: no work on the sabbath or I'll kill you ISRAEL [hasn't had a day off in 400 years]: awesome! GOD: what ISRAEL: we mean...oh no so hard"
"A redditor walks into a reddit restaurant Sorry, all our servers are busy, please come back in a minute."