49404

Joke of the Day

"Apparently, the sonogram machine is to see unborn babies in the womb I thought it was for making you age 10 years. Instantly"

"People often say things in the heat of anger that in hindsight they regret not accompanying with a punch in the face."

"Why did Freud hurt his shoulder? He made a Freudian slip"

"Which dinosaur named all the others? The Thesaurus"

"PAROLE BOARD: And what would you do if released? ME: Crimes. PB: Excuse me? ME: *leans into mic* RHYMES. I'M SUPER INTO POETRY NOW."

"Only if these women were as thorough in choosing a man as they are in choosing which selfies to upload on Facebook maybe they wouldn't get heartbroken so often."

"A stunning pregnant blonde insisted on having a laparoscopic caeserian"

"Why does Axl Rose love to carry around The Scarlet Letter? Because every Rose has its Hawthorne"

"Did you hear about the score of the football match between Egypt and Ethiopia? Egypt 8 - Ethiopia didn't...."

"My ex-wife accused me of being a crossdresser... So I packed her things and left"