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Joke of the Day

"I let a blind man borrow some money the other day He said he'll pay me back the next time he saw me"

"My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!"

"What did dracula say to his girlfriend when she asked about sex? ""I only do oral once a month"""

"A man is walking down the street dragging 20 ft of rope behind him. His neighbor is curious & asks, ""Hey buddy, why you pulling that rope?"" The man replies, ""You ever tried pushing it?"""

"Hey baby, Heaven must be missing an angle because you're kindacute."

"What's 9 inches long, pink, and women scream when you put in their mouth? Their miscarriage"

"What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker? Putin on the Ritz."

"Don't make fun of fat people with lisps... They're thick and tired of it"

"Q: Why do they always fly around a live turkey in a cage on Air Force 1? A: For spare parts."

"I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel."