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Joke of the Day

"A man is walking down the street dragging 20 ft of rope behind him. His neighbor is curious & asks, ""Hey buddy, why you pulling that rope?"" The man replies, ""You ever tried pushing it?"""

"DATING TIP: Any time someone is hot and you're too scared to approach them, remind yourself that they've probably had diarrhea at some point"

"Have you heard the joke about what's in the egg Sorry, you wouldn't find it funny it's more of an inside yolk."

"I like how Twizzlers has the balls to put a flavor description on the package. ""Strawberry""? Suck my ass. More like ""Tire""."

"What's the cheapest present for an ophan? A tattoo with dad"

"A robber broke into my house last night looking for money... So I woke up and started searching with him."

"6, that's SIX, people emailed everyone at work with the SAME information which has resulted in 48 replies and now I wanna quit my job."

"Good cop: WHAT ARE YOU DOING - HE WAS UNARMED Dog cop: *plants a vacuum cleaner on body*"

"Why do Jewish women love to be prostitutes? You got it, you sell it, you still got it."

"To add to the death toll in Paris, this post was enough. She thinks 9/11 is November http://imgur.com/WmkIubI"