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Joke of the Day

"Families in horror movies: *A ghost eats the dog* Hmm probably just the wind. Me at night: *floor creaks*THIS PLACE IS HAUNTED BURN IT DOWN"

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"In my house there are 5 females, 9423 pony tail holders, 49 bottles of nail polish, 8 justin bieber posters & 1 very patient, worn down man."
"How many accident-prone people does it take to change a lightbulb? We're on our sixth."
"The Last Man on Earth I wouldn't mind being the last man on Earth. At least I'd find out if all those girls were telling the truth."
"What do you call a fish with no eyes? A can't see-creature."
"Houston, we have a problem Whitney Houston Jokes Whitney Houston to star in her new film. The Bodybag. One more.., If she wasn't before, Whitney Houston is definitely 100% soul now."
"Good friends are like toasters... If you throw them down the stairs, they probably won't make toast for you anymore."
"What did the lesbian lumberjill say to her girlfriend? Have I got an ax to grind with you."
"How does Donald Trump start his favorite joke? Two Corinthians walk into a bar..."
"Two Cleaners In A Car... Broom Broom"
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