48964

Joke of the Day

"Why should you never let a non-metal drive a train? Because they're poor conductors! (I know they're called Engineers but cut me some slack, I thought of this in the 9th grade.)"

"Yes, curling is silly and basically janitorial work, but that guy's gonna have a gold medal, and all you'll have is your joke about curling."

"From the man himself: What brand of gum does Neil DeGrasse Tyson chew? Eclipse."

"I gain a lot of calories when I go to nutrition class... because it's so damn dry."

"What's the difference between Hitler and Killer Keemstar (DramaAlert)? Hitler knew when to kill himself. (Got this from the youtube comments of Hell)"

"Where does a burger go on vacation? The Swiss (cheese) Alps or The Cheeseapeake Valley!"

"Facebook is a good reminder that I went to school with idiots."

"What is the only olympic sport that mexicans can compete in? Bordercross"

"I told my boss I needed a raise to stay at work because there are three different companies showing interest in me... He asked me which companies and I told him, ""The gas, electric, and cable ones"""

"You know why Trump is still the GOP candidate? The GOP is pro-life."