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Joke of the Day
"Statistics show that most Canadians are nosey. They do, however, say ""zed""."
Next Joke
"*waits until a bird falls asleep, quietly creeps beside it's nest* HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO ARE YOU AWAKE!?!! HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS!?!"
"I asked for a new gaming console for Christmas, instead I got some torn up cardboard, I asked why ""I thought you asked for an ex-box?"""
"Why is it tough to make it as a pornstar? Because the competition is stiff."
"What do you call it when you give a downy kid weed? Baked potato."
"What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale."
"There's a reason the iPhone autocorrects ""Yolo"" to ""tool."""
"DAD: I invented a diaper that's also a time machine! MOM: Where do the poops go DAD: dunno! [CUT TO: A BUNKER IN GERMANY, 1942] HITLER: omfg"
"Welcome to night club. I know it's dark, but that's kinda the poi-- *metal screeching* Dammit Steve! I told you knight club is downstairs!"
"""My imaginary friend is better than yours!"" ~ religion."