195590

Joke of the Day

"""My imaginary friend is better than yours!"" ~ religion."

"Whenever I drink I turn into Jason Bourne. I can't remember much, fighting comes naturally, and I have a sudden need to evade the law."

"You can't run on a camping site... you can only ran because it's past tents"

"What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley? the location of the dirt bag!"

"Justin Bieber's to be the new face of Calvin Klein. Awful news given he does such a terrible job of being the current face of Justin Bieber."

"If you spin an Asian person around, what do they become? Disoriented."

"I was sorting out my loose change when I dropped a 1p coin and saw it roll into a drain, which everyone around me thought was hilarious. Laughing at my ex-pence."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Anthony ! Anthony who ! Anthony you want !"

"I tried to give a motivation: Backfired So this friend of mine broke up with his long term girl friend.I told him "" to hang in there""and he literally hanged himself. Was that a dick motivation?"

"They agree I'm funny I started my new job at the retirement center today. Told the residents that I'm a really funny guy. They didn't understand any of my jokes but they still pissed themselves."