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Joke of the Day

"Give a toddler a crayon and he will eat that crayon. Teach him how to color and he will eat more crayons."

"If you want to get your beer cold out in the wilds Look for the cool ants."

"I wish I could be like my cable company's customer service line and make people press 37 different numbers before they can talk to me."

"If history repeats itself, I'm totally getting a dinosaur!"

"I'm starting to regret my ""2015 FOREVER"" tattoo."

"How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard? 4 or 5."

"So I opened an egg today and something came out. That's the yolk."

"What's the difference between a Private and a Private First Class? Where they sit on an airplane."

"Someone hash-tagged ""share the love,"" and I read it as ""shave the love."" I thought, yeah, I can get on board with that."

"Knock, Knock Who's there. Buccaneer. Buccaneer who. You'll have to speak up; i can't buccaneer hear you"