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Joke of the Day

"Auto correct is like when a 3yo kid wants to help wash the car.its a nice gesture but really its just slowing shit down! :)"

"Apparently, changing your profile to ""Flirty, dirty and a little squirty"" gets you kicked out of Christian Mingle."

"I carry a gun because I'd rather be judged by 12 than carried by six."

"What do you get if a post office burns down? Black mail."

"Wanna hear a joke? Fine Bros."

"Schrodinger's Pussy... There may or may not be a dick in the box."

"Which clown has killed the most people? Ronald McDonald"

"What does Trump call his immigration plan? Order 66."

"""It's not a colonoscopy, it's a colonoscpportunity!"" - gastroenterologist who is also a motivational speaker"

"Are you frome Tennessee? Because you're a bitch."