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Joke of the Day
"In a parallel universe calories are trying to burn people."
Next Joke
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"What do you call a woman with one nipple? Titty Wap."
"Welcome to the jungle. My name is Axl Rose. I think you'll find we run a pretty good jungle here. There's the toilet *points everywhere*"
"An 80's style montage of me and a dog learning to use chopsticks, and the dog progressing marginally faster"
"Friend: your not going to believe this but my whole family was killed in a freak accident! Me: *you're"
"How does Michael J Fox take his martinis? Shaken. Not stirred"