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Joke of the Day

"What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? Synonym Toast Crunch If you said Synonym Life, please leave."

"So a conservative was browsing r/news Haha that's a good one."

"Q: What did the judge say about the man shot twelve times by the police? A: The most horrific suicide scenario I have ever heard of."

"What do you call a Mexican with crazy intentions? A locomotive!"

"What do hockey goaltenders and Alaskan prostitutes have in common? They only change their pads after the third period."

"What's the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Michael Phelps CAN finish a race!"

"How do you know when there's a lead singer on your porch? They can't find the right key and don't know when to come in."

"What do we say to the god of procrastination? Not today."

"I have a lot of jokes about the unemployed... ...but none of them work."

"If a cop pulls you over for talking on your phone, just tell him you were reporting a drunk driver."