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Joke of the Day

"Best joke I've ever made *I open the door to leave the house* Me: It's raining outside? Mom: Yeah, and it's chilly; you might want a jacket. Me: It's raining chili?!"

"An optimistic donut sees the cop as half full."

"Villain: We meet again, Mr. Bond Bond: You don't remember my 1st name do you Villain: Sure I do. It's uh.. Bond: C'mon this is our 3rd fight"

"If you play Stairway to Heaven backwards does it become Highway to Hell?"

"I hate when people text 'call me'. I'm going to start calling people, say 'text me' and then hang up."

"I really hate to get religious on here, but have you seen the thigh gap on Jesus. DAYUM!"

"JELLYFISH: *to friend* Want to see something disgusting? Watch this. *stings person* FRIEND: That wasn't dis... JELLYFISH: Wait a minute."

"A man walks in to a bar His alcoholism is destroying his family."

"I once had a llama."

"What did the Mexican say when his house collapsed on him? Hey, get off me homes !"