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Joke of the Day

"A Funeral Director isn't the best position in this economy... It's a dying trade"

"What did the little black kid think when he got diarrhea? He was melting"

"I should start a sandwich shop that only sells flatbreads. You'd be able to select your own fillings. I'll call it ""Pita this, pita that"""

"Why did the skeptic man have high blood pressure? Because he kept taking advice with a pinch of salt!"

"I'd like a new frog please. But you bought one only yesterday. What happened? It Kermit-ted suicide."

"How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? I don't know, but it's at least 6, because my basement is still dark!!"

"A tangent applied for a credit card, but was denied. He couldn't find anyone willing to cosine."

"This is your captain speaking, AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING."

"The Past, the Present and the Future Walked into a Bar... It was tense."

"Coworker: I need someone in the backfill position Brain: Do. Not. Say. Anything. Me: um hopefully you fill the gap soon Brain: oh dear"