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Joke of the Day

"Airlines. Graciously giving you the choice to have feet, or a personal item, but not both."

"[Catwoman's Lair] Robin: I hear someone. Batman: Lets's hide in this sandpit. {5 min later} R: This is a litter box isn't it? B: I think so."

"My family and I are going camping for Memorial Weekend. I asked my mother if I could bring my trombone so I can practice, but she said no, because we might get ***banned.***"

"why is history called his-story because no one wants to read about 6000 years of cooking and cleaning...zing"

"I went camping over the weekend... It was in tents."

"Got all the way to the car and realized I left my keys back at the office The two things I hate most in life: 1. ISIS and 2. Accidental exercise"

"I love dry erase boards... They're remarkable."

"Crappy wordplay jokes... ...the cruelest form of punishment. I'll let myself out now."

"How many professional soccer players does it take to change a light bulb? Six. One to change the bulb, and five to hug and kiss him."

"They should harvest the excess fat from fat people to turn into fossil fuels, to solve the world energy problems. Or world hunger."