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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil."

"What is Israel's favorite planet? Jewpiter"

"So an Irishman walks out of a bar ... no seriously, it can happen. (seen in an Irish pub)"

"My mom's MILFshake brings all the boys to the I can't even stomach this joke."

"Why is it called Black Friday? Because the deals are such..A nigger"

"13yo Jesus: You're not my real dad! I HATE YOU! Joseph: One of these days boy, I'll [distant thunder] I'll do nothing. Absolutely nothing."

"I was going to right down a joke about espousal abuse... But my hand was too sore"

"*passive aggressively turns off Christmas lights when someone stops too long to look at them*"

"Who was the first mathematician? A concave man"

"First Guy: ""How many vampires showed up to the garlic eating competition today?"" ... ... ..... Second Guy: ""I don't know, it was countless."""