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Joke of the Day
"Why do people keep asking me what I'm going to be doing in three years? I don't have 2020 vision."
Next Joke
"Why there should be a February 30th So dentists can have a day to celebrate"
"Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell."
"America is in the labor room right now... Within 24 hours we will know if it's a boy or a girl."
"If you have any snacks left when the movie starts you're a wizard & need to be killed."
"[Americas Got Talent] ME: *reads an opinion different than mine online without getting offended* JUDGE (under his breath): how'd he do that"
"""Gotham deserves a relaxed hero that smells of lavender."" - Bathman"
"Guys, leave 3 notes scattered around ur house for ur girlfriend that say ""Will"", ""you"", & ""me."" That'll keep her busy while u watch sports."
"Loving someone and not expressing it is like wrapping a gift and not giving it."
"Today's Favorited tweet is tomorrow's Facebook update."