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Joke of the Day

"""Gotham deserves a relaxed hero that smells of lavender."" - Bathman"

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"Just once In a post-game interview, I'd love to see an athlete credit Natural Selection for his team's win."
"What kind of bees scare neckbeards? Boo-bees."
"4 out of 5 dead husbands agree that last casserole tasted really strange."
"A sheep, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff together. Ba-dum-tss"
"What does a 500 pound parakeet say? ""TWEET!!!"" * [Source1](http://i.imgur.com/9HEfWT1.jpg) * [Source2](http://i.imgur.com/JR1VTA0.jpg)"
"Where do you take someone who overdoses on homeopathic medicine? A mental hospital"
"I'm not saying Goldilocks was a piece of shit, but she broke into someone's house and just started eating their breakfast."
"What do I think about during sex? My wife waiting for me to get home."
"Two cows walk into a vegan bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve your kind here."""