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Joke of the Day
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent!"
Next Joke
"The cancelled marathon runners should seriously run through the boroughs with supplies. I said it earlier as a joke, now I say it for real."
"purposely bought tall lace up boots so I'll never have to be anywhere on time again"
"No matter which kids book I read to my screaming baby on an airplane, the moral of the story is always something about a vasectomy."
"Corn mazes are a bit redundant."
"Him: ""Wow you've got alot of hair"" Me: ""Thanks grew it myself"""
"Did you hear about the gay Irish couple? Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick."
"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side"
"What do you call a policewoman who shaves her pubic area? Cuntstubble!"
"At least my mother died doing what she loved... Committing suicide"