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Joke of the Day
"purposely bought tall lace up boots so I'll never have to be anywhere on time again"
Next Joke
"What do you call a really annoying Jewish women? ....Ausbitch."
"What was used to grow crops on Mars in the movie Martian? Good Shit"
"I tried to stop cussing for like five months... But I said fuck it."
"I pet my dog and she started to purr. Thought I should lay off the drugs until I realized the cat was sitting behind her."
"Damn girl are you sitting on a F5 key? Cos' that ass is refreshing"
"My doctor is so young that, when I need them, he just comes in the room shouting, ""Shots! Shots! Shots!"""
"I'm very good to my wife, everyday I'll run the hot water and put the bubbles in for her ...just to make doing the dishes that bit easier."
"Only in SF: people checking into the riot on Foursquare."
"Porn gives unrealistic expectations. The plumber took his usual 60 per hour, even though I sucked his cock."