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Joke of the Day

"Now boarding... Two vultures board an airplane each is carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, ""I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."""

Next Joke
 
"I've just started work as a human chess piece. The money's good, I'm on knights this week."
"I always carry a pair of shades with me because you never know when you might see a dead body & say something cool"
"[Rock Paper Scissors Best of 7 Championship] *down 3 games to 0 against Edward Scissorhands* MY COACH: Stop choosing paper!"
"Just had curried pelican for lunch... Not bad, but the bill was enormous."
"I went to see a movie about Beethoven... it was du-du-du dull, du-du-du-dull."
"Yo mama's so fat... Instead of a cartwheel she does a ferriswheel."
"If Ice Cube and Snoop Dogg adopted a child... they could call it Slush Puppy :)"
"Girlfriend: ""What's senior year without a little slacking?"" Me: ""Junior year."""
"A one-liner based on what happened to me at work. An insect landed in my beverage, now I'm feeling a bit fly-tea."