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Joke of the Day

"[Rock Paper Scissors Best of 7 Championship] *down 3 games to 0 against Edward Scissorhands* MY COACH: Stop choosing paper!"

"What did the slutty girl buy at the furniture store? One nightstand."

"hey girl are u from tennessee cause u have a tennessee accent and i have ur birth certificate here and it says ur from tennessee"

"What did Oscar Pistorius say when his cellmate asked him how he ended up in prison? ""I'm stumped."""

"What's the worst thing about having sex with a Bulimic? She won't swallow"

"I asked a Jewish girl her number She said she didn't have one, but could give me her grandfather's."

"How long do I have to sleep before I'm legally a bear?"

"Someone just posted an article on Facebook and said ""file this under sad."" WAS I SUPPOSED TO BE FILING EVERYTHING"

"Life in 1914-1945 Europe must have been hard. All those geopolitical events and no TV shows to compare them to"

"If Lebron's so much better than Jordan then explain to me why Bugs Bunny has never once asked for his help in a game. Cant argue with facts."