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Joke of the Day

"YOLO You Only Love Owls."

"How can Peter Pan fly? You'd fly too if somebody panned your peter."

"how do you hide from hitler? Standstill.... he can nazi."

"Never trust a tree. They're shady as fuck."

"Once upon a time, a rabbit went bald... ...and he was so embarrassed that he ran away. He was hare today, gone tomorrow."

"I always smoke after sex. I've quit now for 16 years."

"'I have a baby-sized dick' he said. He wasn't lying. 19 inches, 7.5 lbs."

"If someone is born deaf and dumb, blind, has no arms or legs.... Can we actually call him a piece of meat?"

"There are 10 types of people in this world... ...those that understand binary, and those that don't."

"Are you seeing someone? Me: Are you seeing someone? Girl: Um, no. Me: Not even a psychiatrist?"