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Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the dimwit who was so dumb he thought Gatorade was welfare for crocodiles?"
Next Joke
"""Do you think I reference dinosaurs too much when I write?"" I asked. She was silent, like the p in pterodactyl, but it said everything."
"My wife can't cook so she asked me for help in baking a cake. I told her to separate 2 eggs... She put one in the bedroom and one in the bathroom.. Ijit."
"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick in your mouth!"
"Why can you only drown a hipster in a tributary? Because, it isn't mainstream."
"Why did the Irish call their currency the ""Punt"" ? Because it rhymes with Bank Manager"
"Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you a flat minor"
"I like my chocolate like I like my men. Rich."
"Thinking of starting a website that auto-tweets when you j/o. ""I'm the mayor of MY GARAGE on JERKSQUARE."""
"What can you never get from a gay person? a straight answer. Accepting alternate answers in the comments"