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Joke of the Day

"Life in 1914-1945 Europe must have been hard. All those geopolitical events and no TV shows to compare them to"

"2016 has been pretty bad but at least girls stopped drawing mustaches on their index fingers and holding them under their noses."

"If you think nobody cares whether you're alive... try missing a couple of payments."

"How do you know a girl with leprosy likes you? She gives you the eye."

"Do you know why Parisians only have a single egg for breakfast? Because in France one egg is un uf."

"*calls mom* ""Ma I made 3 friends on twitter today"" *long pause* ""Mom?"" *mom stares at 3 fake twitter accounts she made, fights tears* ""Mom?"""

"How many Arabs does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just sit in the dark and blame the Jews."

"A chicken, a hawk and a duck walk into a lawn... SuperDuck"

"How do you make an egg roll? Push it."

"What do you call a well read/researched Bernie Sanders supporter? Not a Bernie Sanders supporter."