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Joke of the Day

"What did the mama pig say when junior pig bought a basket of wormy apples? ""Don't tell the farmer. He might charge us extra."""

"Why would you never starve to death in a desert? Because you'd probably die of dehydration first. While a human can only go about a week without water, it can go up to three weeks without food."

"I met a refugee on the train today. ""What country are you from?"", I asked. ""Iraq"", he replied. ""How did you escape?"" i ran."

"My Grandfather invented the cold air balloon It never really took off."

"If money doesn't buy happiness.. then explain why you have to pay for a divorce."

"I'm glad my mom is such a bad cook If my date can eat her meatloaf with a smile, I know they'll swallow anything."

"Copper wire was invented by two Jews fighting over a penny."

"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeleine McCann"

"Why do asians have such squinty eyes? Because atomic bombs are pretty bright."

"My wife wanted me to whisper dirty things in her ear... So I leaned forward and said: ""dishes, bathroom and laundry."""