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Joke of the Day
"My Grandfather invented the cold air balloon It never really took off."
Next Joke
"Why did the fish's car break down? It needed a tuna-up."
"Teacher: You can do anything you set your mind to [I try to sneak outta class but somehow mess up the pull door twice] Except maybe that guy"
"Polar Bear Q: How do you catch a polar bear? A: You make a hole in the ice and line it with peas. When the bear goes in to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole."
"Heard Prince changed his name... ...to, ""The Artist Formerly known as Alive""."
"""I'm still a virgin"" -theres plenty of fish in the sea ""Ur right. I'll find someone"" -no, I mean u should give up & be a lonely fisherman"
"People I live with are hiding my shit. The two most effective hiding places to date: 1) out in the open 2) where I last left it"
"Cashier: would u like a bag? Me: no I'll just carry the economy box of pads & Midol out so whoever thinks of kidnapping me will think twice"
"Why do Nazis love Vinyls? Cause you can turn the tables from 45 to 33."
"Come on, there has got to be at least one business like show business."