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Joke of the Day

"As soon as I plugged in my laptop, all my files became unreadable. I guess power corrupts."

"What do you call a story about beastiality? Fifty Shades of Neigh"

"""Do you like Tolstoy?"" ""Of course. Who doesn't?"" ""What's your favourite book?"" ""The one where Woody is kidnapped & Buzz tries to save him""."

"Stereotype Why do brown women wear red dots on their heads? - Because they record everything. (I swear I made it up n I'm brown too)"

"What's the difference between an Apple and a Prostitute. I don't cum over my apple before I eat it."

"Friend- ""God you eat so much. How do you do it?"" Me- ""It's easy, I just gain weight."""

"Justin Bieber.... I have recently changed the sound of my alarm clock to ""Justin Bieber - Baby"". Now I wake up 5 minutes earlier every day, so I don't have to listen to it."

"My wife and I adopted an abandoned newborn. She was affected by shaken baby syndrome... ...We're naming her Jostlelyne! I made that one up myself."

"Why did two ferrets decide to meet? They were trying to start a business."

"There's been and explosion is a French cheese factory... All that's left is de brie!"