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Joke of the Day
"Why such hate on Lance Armstrong? I think his riding style is pretty dope."
Next Joke
"I would tell you a joke about a vampire... ...but it would probably suck."
"Someone at work asked if I'd listened to any good books lately, and now I've got a body to dispose of. :("
"If you are reading this you are probably not blind."
"Dams. The only thing that holds back liquid better... Is the idea of using a port-a-potty. ""Look, I know my pants are brownening and getting wet, but I'll just wait forever -- I CANNOT go in there."""
"Gardening I was gardening the other day when my older brother rang to ask if I wanted to hang out. I promptly said yes because you know what they say, bros before hose."
"like my grandfather did, i want to die peacefully in my sleep... ...not screaming and yelling like his passengers"
"ASIAN KIDS: Do they make you ride through the X-ray machine at the airport since your minds are basically computers?"
"*84th flr* CW: You look sad, can I cheer you up? M: Heard Van Halen's ""Jump""? CW: Sure! Me: Jump out that window and sing it on the way down"
"The Goonies went looking for pirate treasure and ended up finding the greatest treasure of all: pirate treasure."