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Joke of the Day
"What do I get when I raise up a platform to play Mozart? Amadeus on my dais."
Next Joke
"Is that a cop behind me? No, just a car with a bike rack. Or maybe it's an undercover cop with a bike rack? -Weed"
"How can you tell when your wife has died? The sex is the same but the dishes start piling up in the sink."
"A snake walks into a bar And the bartender yells, ""How the fuck did you just walk in here?!"""
"ME: There's no i in team but there is one in pizza WIFE: so you're not going to share ME: I am not going to share"
"Real redneck woman. How do you know you're with a real redneck woman? She can put in a dip know what to spit and what to swallow."
"I make my girlfriend work out 5 times a week and eat healthy. I don't want her getting fat like my wife."
"Is it wrong to make change from the collection plate? Asking for a friend."
"Who's the world most famous blacksmith? Will Smith"
"Being possessed would be cool because you could turn your head all the way around to say ""wrong hole"""