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Joke of the Day

"On a Scale of 1 to 10, How Obsessed am I with Harry Potter? 9 3/4 *Credit goes to a tee shirt I saw. I'm not that witty.*"

"Where does the king keep his armies? In his sleevies!"

"I was doing CPR on a co-worker for 5 minutes before someone told me that's just how she laughs"

"Whats the world weakest animal ? A toad he croaks if you even touch him !"

"DO NOT OPEN.PLEASE. I like you, you little rebel."

"When can a woman make you a millionaire? When you're a billionaire (Credit to Kevin Hart)"

"I am really good at making jokes. Title."

"What is the opposite of an autist? A socialist."

"My trainer said with enough sacrificing I could get a 6-pack. He's full of shit & I have 4 dead goats & 17 decapitated chickens to prove it."

"Longest English word: 'pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosi' Longest Spanish word: 'GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL'"