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Joke of the Day

"I just saw a guy with a mustache exactly like my grandpa's. I doubt it was his though; grandpa never let anyone borrow his mustache."

"What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? [nsfw] The wheelchair."

"What did the body-builder say after his house got robbed? No whey..."

"[WOLF CUB] Dad, why do we howl at the moon? [WOLF DAD] Well son, the moon is made of cheese and that's rad as hell"

"My friend told me he is FINALLY going to watch the Back to the Future series. ""It's about time,"" I told him."

"What do Trump supporters and child molesters have in common? They both like immature assholes."

"*sits* This is nice. *stands* This is also pretty cool. *lays down* Oh okay this is my favorite."

"One of My Ex's was absolutely beautiful. But, it didn't workout because all she wanted to do was SWING. I miss third grade."

"How do you get a job with Apple? Be born in China."

"How heavy is a photon? I don't know, but it's probably light-weight"