42411

Joke of the Day

"The only thing worse than seeing something done wrong is seeing it done slowly."

"My thai-girlfriend told me it's ok to have a small penis I would still prefer that she had a vagina. EDIT: Grammar thx to /u/Jarabar"

"What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ? A pineapple !"

"No, I haven't lost weight but ""spanx"" for asking."

"A man was rushed to the ER with six toy horses up his ass The doctors described his condition as stable."

"I bet dogs have a really hard time playing Twister Left paw: grey Other left paw: darker grey, but not the darkest grey. Sort of in between"

"comedy jokes : ? , : ? ! : , - ! . : , . - 32/ - 6 8 . . . . . . . : , , "

"I would like to work as a janitor in Microsoft. I could see myself excel in that job."

"I'm thinking of something really stupid to tweet -all of us all the time"

"What did the clam with a lisp say to his greedy friend? You're so shelfish!"