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Joke of the Day

"Love is like peeing yourself everyone can see but only you feel the warmth."

"I can tell my Girlfriends ass is getting bigger, She fits in my Wife's jeans."

"What do you call a bird born in the 90s? A millennial falcon."

"I don't appreciate the trash talking Chinese athletes saying ""we OWN you!"" to the U.S. team. Let's leave our deficit out of this!"

"Leading up to the wedding (NAME) has been on a whiskey diet. His lost three days already."

"Sorry I can't go out. I forgot to charge my phone halfway though the day."

"Did you hear about the whores who ran a bakery? Yeah. Everything there was hoe-made."

"A toothless beaver walks into a pub and asks... ...is the bar tender here?"

"What is the appropriate response to a great performance at the Special Olympics? A handiclap"

"What do you call a prostitute who's upset about gun control? A sandy hooker"