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Joke of the Day
"3... 2... 1... sandwich? You fool! You've pressed the LUNCH button, not the LAUNCH button!"
Next Joke
"How can you tell if a girls tinder profile is fake? They're attractive!"
"Sometimes it's really hard to tell who's winning when you fight sarcasm with sarcasm."
"Marriage is like a seesaw. It's not fun if one of them is fat."
"Q: How many Survivors does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One to start screwing it in and the rest to vote 'em off the ladder."
"I like to make things awkward on first dates just by shouting ""wrong hole!!"" at inappropriate times, like when you're eating."
"Why are black girls tame in bed? Because they have no daddy issues."
"Want to hear a joke about pizza? Nah, it's too cheesy."
"What is a priest's favorite guitar chord? Gsus"
"What has four legs and a cunt halfway up its back? A police horse"