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Joke of the Day

"I didnt know what to wear to my first meeting of the premature ejaculation society.... ...so i came in my pants."

"Why do dentists recommend jpeg? It is a flossy compression method."

"I believe in the vagina like other people believe in God I've never seen one before, but I have faith."

"Have you heard of the two Mexican firemen? Hose-A and Hose-B."

"What does a panda say when it's out of food? Chute"

"I, too, am shocked Ted Cruz has had sex. I just assumed his kids were born when he ate after midnight and got wet like in the movie Gremlins"

"I really need to find a boyfriend. Guy at poker table was like ""This is my girlfriend, Kayla,"" and I was like, ""This is my sandwich, Ham."""

"That awkward moment when your girlfriend is looking up for a noodles recipe on your computer and opens a file called ""Asian."""

"How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool"

"A friend's uncle asked how to use Amazon. He may need an Internet primer... ...do you think Sherwin-Williams makes one?"