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Joke of the Day

"Q. How can you tell if a car is German? A. when a jew gets in it the doors lock and the heat turns on."

"I'd like to die in my sleep like my grandpa Comfortably, unlike the rest of the people in his car"

"What do you call an Asian cow in space? The Milky Wei."

"Why can't the blonde get her drivers license? Everytime the car stops, she wants to jump in the backseat."

"I'm getting worried about the amount of violence in modern society. I went to a pet shop and asked the man behind the counter ""Do you have fat balls? He punched me on the nose."

"What's the main thing a woman needs to think about when considering a potential boyfriend? Is this the man I want my kids to spend every second weekend with?"

"I haven't been laid in so long that the Pope is laughing at me."

"Teacher: did you cheat on your math test? Me: [remembering having sex with a history exam] umm no way"

"""Let there be me."" God, just before he created himself out of nothing."

"What's the best pokemon in pokemon go? It's Victreebel if you go to a gym you will always get a victory with it."