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Joke of the Day

"When I get home from work, I like to pack myself into really small suitcases. I can hardly contain myself."

"Hearing them call a 25 year old hockey player a 'veteran' and a 28 year old player 'old' has done zilch for my self esteem today"

"What's black and steals your change? Vending machines."

"Why is Saturn like your balls?? Because it is in between jupeter an your anus."

"Why don't black people get on cruises anymore? They aren't falling for that one again."

"This guy at my school has eight zits on his face. We call him octo pus."

"Why'd the band teacher go to jai? Because he fingered A-minor"

"Scientists just announced the discovery of another planet in our solar system They're calling it Plu-two"

"For a period, Houdini used a trap door in every single show he did... I guess you could say it was a stage he was going through."

"What did the cop say to his belly button? You're under a vest lol"