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Joke of the Day

"What has 9 arms, 7 legs, 4 heads, and 13 feet? The finish line of the Boston Marathon."

"Today a preacher told me that Jesus died for me, it made feel feel horrible.... I didn't even know the poor guy was sick!"

"What do you call a fat lady that can tell your future? A four-chin teller"

"It's a dark stormy night. You're scared & alone. You hear a bump in the night. You jump! You scream! Then your cat comes in the house drunk."

"I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to take part in a rape fantasy She screamed NO!! I said thats the spirit"

"What do you call a Chinese millionare? Ching-Ching."

"Hi, my name is Ivanna.. Hi, My Name Is Ivanna Humpalot!"

"Where do otters come from? Otter Space!"

"You know what's odd about those girls at Starbucks? They, like, literally can't, even."

"Why was Jimmy sad? Cause Jimmy had a frog stapled to his face."