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Joke of the Day

"My daughter demanded she be treated like a princess... so I married her off to secure an alliance with the French."

"This Jewish kid asks his dad for five dollars... and his dad goes, ""Four dollars? What do you need three dollars for?"""

"What's the difference between a Catholic and a Jew? At least when a Catholic scars you for life, you might get to cum."

"Making good jokes about the clitoris is difficult: It's really sensitive."

"There was this cute girl next to me and I missed a lot of obvious signals... We both ended up dying from the car crash."

"What did the hippie say when he was asked to leave the party? ""Namaste"""

"A nice one (maybe repost) I don't smoke, I don't drink, I never swear and - Oh shit my cigaette fell into my beer!"

"What did Robin Williams suicide note say? ""Sorry guys...I gotta go see about a girl."""

"What's the cheapest type of meat to buy?? Deer balls; because they're under a buck."

"When Mr. Maxwell's wife left him he couldn't sleep. ""She took the bed!"""