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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a really extraordinary farmer? A man outstanding in his field."

"I just want to thank you for explaining that Geico ad to me. It means a great deal."

"Just remember, you can't please everyone. So just focus on what's important, pleasing me."

"Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left? (Really?) Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left?"

"If an Elvis impersonator dies, doesn't he kind of become the best Elvis impersonator"

"My friend and I had this never-ending argument in a swimming pool in France Turned into a total piscine contest"

"What do you call a heard of sperm whales? Bukkake."

"What's long, black, and smelly? The unemployment line"

"I wanted to set my password as madeline But apparently that's taken."

"Q: How many London taxi drivers does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: What ? Go all the way up there and come back empty ? You must be jokin' mate !"