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Joke of the Day

"[after i confess to murder] COP: sarge? you gotta see this [shows interrogation video and sees my fingers crossed the whole time]"

"I made fun of my Middle Eastern friend's food the other day Now I falafel about it."

"I'm very pleased with my new fridge magnet. So far I've got twelve fridges."

"10th anniversary So my girlfriends dad just accused me of pedophilia, she is 18 and I am 32. It ruined our 10th anniversary"

"What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hits were The Wall."

"Why did Mario lose a life? He stubbed his MiyamoToe. ...I'll see my way out."

"There's 2 types of people in this world... Ones that pee in the shower And liars"

"I always keep at least 6 wigs in my trunk for trips to the grocery store so I can keep going back for samples"

"What do you call an angry terrorist? Amin Amood"

"Did you hear about the native American who tried to beat the world record for drinking the most tea? The next day he was found dead in his tea pee"