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Joke of the Day

"""Let's name it something that people will automatically connect with movies."" - Not the guys who started Fandango."

"I want a pet otter just so I can introduce it as my otter half."

"If you think you're having a bad day.. just remember, somebody is going to have Snooki as a mom"

"if i ever go missing please don't use that photo of me holding a sign that says ""if i ever go missing don't look for me."" thanks"

"sex toy. do you know about ISIS making there own sex dolls? it blows up itself."

"Confucius say... ...sex on beach is like American beer, very near water."

"Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes."

"Some women are born to make history.... I prefer the ones who get deleted from mine."

"Q: What is the difference between a trombone and a trumpet? A: A trombone will bend before it breaks."

"turn on: when you double space your essay and it goes from 3 to 5 pages"