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Joke of the Day

"Question and Answer Q: Did you hear about the Mexico City earthquake? A: It did $100 million worth of improvements"

"How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon ? Melon-collie !"

"""And the Oscar for Best Actress goes to.....Beyonce?"" *Kanye slowly sits down*"

"[alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days"

"If you think it's ""uncool"" to love America, why don't you go see how ""cool"" it is to live in a country that doesn't have toilets or pizza."

"To make it safer to use the mobile phone when I'm driving, I've deleted all my German male contacts. I now completely Hans free."

"Did you hear about Brussels? Looks like we'll be short on sprouts this year..."

"Why did so many blacks die in Vietnam? Every time someone said ""Get down!"" they jumped up and started dancing."

"What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo? One's a quite heavy, and the other's a little lighter."

"Funny how shampoo bottles weigh like, 2 pounds in real life, but when dropped in the shower they turn into a meteor."